Friday, October 28, 2005

Poop Prison and Propagandhi

Hey there as-of-yet-non-existent reader. How's it going?

This is my first BLoG post, so please be patient. Why do I have a BLoG you ask? Well, if you know me, and chances are you do, I have a lot of things to say. And with a BLoG, instead of blathering on and on about something you are probably not as excited about as I am to your various beautiful faces, I can blather endlessly into the bottomless pit that is the internet. If you've happened to fish my BLoG outta there, Cheers!

Now, on with the show. I think most of my posts will come in rapid fire 1-2 sentence commentary on a vast array of wildly divergent topics. 1...2...1234 GO!

-The Name of this BLoG-Bob Loblaw is the name of a lawyer on a FOX (Don't watch their news channel. It's a Republican propaganda machine through and through. Watch a documentary called "Outfoxed" if you don't believe me.) sitcom titled "Arrested Development", which is easily the most cleverly and hilariously written show on TV. Granted, sitcoms are usually devoid of any worthwhile content whatsoever, but not this one. I would tell you the next time its gonna be on TV, but I don't know. One of those devoid of worthwhile content shows called "Prison Break" keeps pre-empting "Arrested Development". Prison Break yourself, Prison Break.

-I was driving south down NE 102nd when I came to stop light. In the left turn lane directly adjacent to my vehicle, (The Penny), another car came to a stop. I had my window down and as I currently have no functioning stereo in the penny, I listened in to the car stereo blaring next to me. I thought, "I recognize that tune, its off of the phenomenal punk band "Propagandhi"'s CD called "How to Clean Everything". I turned to the young man listening to Propagandhi and gave the devil horns sign and said "Propagandhi, right on! Turn it up!"

So we rocked out to Propagandhi together in traffic for 20 seconds in the middle of this bullshit "war" in Iraq and in the middle of traffic full of cars sporting bullshit "support our troops" stickers and then it happened. The lyric of the song that happened to be playing for those 20 seconds was "...So tie another yellow ribbon around the oak tree my friend and gee Wally, that's swell....FUCK THE TROOPS TO HELL, (blistering punk rock power chords played at warp speed), FUCK THE TROOPS TO HELLLLLLLLL!!! (screamed at full volume by the singer), and at this moment both me and the young man screamed along, looked at each other, and both laughed our asses off as the light turned green.

Now, I have friends in the military and I don't mean to say that I actually agree with the sentiment expressed in the song, in fact, I pray to the maker that this clusterfuck ends soon and our people get to come home and their people get to be at home in peace. And I have nothing but respect for the soldier's courage and their sacrifices. I know they are good people just stuck in an awful situation. Still, I reveled in the sheer punk-rockness and solidarity of the moment.

-We've covered the prison and the Propagandhi, so guess what's next?

Recipe for Magnificent Bowl-lining C-shaped Poop

-Full Plate of Penne Pasta w/Prego Red Sauce
-One Tyson Chicken Breast cooked on George Foreman Grill
-Green Salad w/Ranch Dressing
-3/4 bottle of 2003 Shiraz (The $3 Trader Joe's bottle works wonders.)
-1/4 bag of Juanita's Tortilla Chips made in Hood River, OR. (The best restaurant style chips I've ever tasted. Better than you get at an actual Mexican restaurant.)

Let stand for 8-10 hours. For best results, sleep for at least 6 of these hours.

Serve warm in cold toilet bowl water. Admire and flush.

Marcus Singer